This interview is really special for our readers as she is the first TEDx Speaker who gave an exclusive interview to our team.
She is full of emotions and qualifications such as Certified PoSH enabler, DEIB Facilitator, NLP Practioner, Writer, Emotional Intelligence Coach and motivational speaker
Jaspriya Gandhok is an empowered personality with 20 years of experience in Training Design & Delivery, Instructional Design and Skill Development. Having worked extensively with various organizations across industries, such as Hero MindMine, Daksh, Convergys, GE, Centum and NIIT Ltd
1) Is it true "A great coach doesn’t give answers. Instead, they ask powerful questions to unlock "?
JG – Yes, this statement holds for coaching and this is what sets coaching different from mentoring or counselling. The coach works with you to help you unlock your fears, apprehensions, and roadblocks and reach your full potential. Additionally, coaching is very goal specific, hence the need to ask powerful questions. Answers to these questions help to set realistic goals and create an effective plan to achieve them.
2) What are the best ways for you to support yourself at this point?
JG – Personally speaking, I am learning to stay detached from my surroundings. By detachment, I don’t mean being disinterested. What I mean is that I try not to react to all that is happening around me. I take a moment to observe and absorb things and then formulate a response, if, at all, it is needed. Sometimes, not responding is the best response.
3) Why do we need someone as a coach even when we have teachers, mentors or guardians within our lives?
JG – As I mentioned earlier, a coach has no advice to give you and sometimes that is exactly what you need – No Advice. When people give you advice, they may have your best interest at heart but they don’t have your experience or they are not feeling what you are feeling. So, their advice is from their perspective. A coach asks you questions to make you aware of your feelings, emotions, thoughts and expectations. Once you uncover these, you arrive at a solution that works for you. A coach helps you to be more independent, responsible and accountable in your decisions and actions.
4) What are the key lessons from your life that you want to share with all of us?
JG – There are three lessons that I have learnt in my life, which I have also shared in my TEDx talk. The first is to let go of the victim mindset. Be grateful for all that is good in your life, instead of focusing on what is wrong. Once you are free of the victim mindset, you are more in control of your life and what you make out of it. The second is to know yourself and invest in your emotional well-being. We all get our regular health checks done, we make sound investments to ensure financial well-being but we don’t give a thought to emotional well-being. A healthy and happy mind is essential for a fulfilling life. Third and the last lesson is to have a purpose in life. And by purpose I don’t mean anything grand, neither does it include your responsibilities. Your purpose in life should be something that brings you joy, it is the reason for you to get out of bed every morning.
5) Do you think poetry is just like a healing process? Share your experience when you came back to hold a pen and were nervous about emotions.
JG – Absolutely! Poetry, along with many other forms of art, is used as a therapy technique. Poetry helps you give expression to your emotions. At times, it is difficult to share your thoughts with others. In such circumstances, writing gives an outlet to your pent-up feelings. I started writing at a very young age but then came a time when I was so caught up with life that I stopped writing. A few life-changing events that happened in my life about two years ago made me pick up the pen again. If you read my poems from two years ago to now, you will find that they are strikingly different in mood, emotions and topicality.
6) Share some reactions and major changes within your life when you added value for yourself as a TEDx Speaker.
JG – The experience of speaking on the TEDx stage was out of the ordinary. Naturally, I was extremely nervous however once I started speaking, I become more and more confident. The response to my talk was so overwhelming, especially from women. So many women told me that they felt inspired by the story and that was very humbling for me. It was not easy for me to share the darkest phase of my life on the stage, but what motivated me to do that was the feeling that if my story helps even a single woman to find the strength to break free of a toxic relationship, then I must share it. And while I intended to help other women find a voice in my story, after my talk, when I bared my life out in the open, I felt free.
you can catch this Talk on https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bq-y_bRdXkI
7) Why do we need setbacks before some comeback? What's your take on it?
JG – Human beings are creatures of habit. Once we fall into a routine, a comfort zone, we don’t like to shake things up. We are averse to change because we are scared of the unknown that comes with any kind of change. Familiarity gives us comfort and we don’t push ourselves to do more or be more. That’s why sometimes a setback shakes us up in a way that we are left with no choice but to make a comeback. Though is not the best way to shake things up. I feel that if you want things to be different from what they are at the moment, you have to start doing things differently. If you are not happy about something or someone, just wishing for things to become better will not help. You have to take charge – this is what being proactive is.
8) What are the specific challenges for single parents in this decade as per your observation with your clients and their experience?
JG – There is a very famous saying – “It takes a village to raise a child.” What this means is that raising children is a huge responsibility and all the help you can get is welcome. However, as we witness changing family dynamics, this is not always possible. Being a single parent is not easy, because it is a huge responsibility to shoulder – from day-to-day chores of child-rearing to big decisions around personal and professional choices. But the most important aspect is to ensure the emotional well-being of the children. One thing I tell the single parents who come to me is that you must never let your differences with your estranged spouse colour your children’s perspective. Don’t use your children as a means to hurt or manipulate your spouse.
9) Do you think we may need separate schools or arenas reserved for mental health in near future?
JG – No, I don’t think so because mental health should not be treated as a taboo and it should be easily accessible as any other kind of treatment. I also think that inclusion, rather than exclusion, will help deal with mental health issues more effectively as it can provide an environment to foster strong support systems.
10) It's really difficult to start your life right from scratch, do you have any message for such fellow achievers? Also share contact modes to reach you.
JG – As I mentioned earlier, humans don’t welcome change and there is no bigger change than starting your life all over, especially when you think that you were well on your destined path. Now that I have gone through this, I feel that being flexible and adaptable helps you to navigate through challenges with comparative ease. It makes setbacks more like course corrections instead of starting all over again. You can follow me on social networking platforms:
Catch me on LinkedIn:https://www.linkedin.com/in/jaspriyagandhok/